A Life-Changing Exercise

I have to continue to give God thanks for the time I've had to reflect on my life and my issues in the past two months. I feel like I am slowly getting what I was looking for: A closer relationship with the Lord.

I have been working my way through several Christian books during this time, but one that has been particularly helpful has been a LifeGuide Bible study on Christian Beliefs, by Stephen Eyre. In addition to leading readers through topics like "God in the World & in the Word," "The Holy Spirit" and "Our Identity and Dignity," some chapters culminate with mental exercises that are meant to open dialogue between you and God.

A particularly powerful exercise closed out the chapter on "Our Identity & Depravity." The exercise was to:

"Invite God to take a tour of your inner life for the purpose of cleaning it out. Keep in mind that the purpose of this tour is not to condemn you but to cleanse you. As God walks through the corridors of your heart, let him see your self-centeredness, envy, anger, jealousy, bitterness and whatever else that God calls sin. Ask God to cleanse each sin with his transforming holiness and grace. After you have spend some time with God on this tour, make a note about how it affected you."

A few weeks before doing this exercise, I had an epiphany about particularly troublesome areas in my life, that there comes a point when human will alone is not enough, when we have to invite God in to take over. (I have been a self-focused person bent on controlling my life, so this was a big win for me.) After doing the exercise, I felt a lot lighter mentally. I no longer have to rely on my imperfect abilities to transform my life. I no longer have to fear that I will never be able to change myself for better. I simply have to believe that God is working his infinite power on my weaknesses, and I will begin to see signs of changes when I remove the clutter of negativity and inhibiting self-talk from my head and heart.

I encourage anyone who feels broken, anyone who feels stuck, to try this exercise. Be honest with yourself about the unclean parts of your soul, and give God a chance to wash you whiter than snow.